Failed Coheed & Cambria song names

Okay, so earlier today I posted my take on Coheed & Cambria. I feel good about it, but I think I failed to really drive home one thing about the band I find extremely interesting.

The song titles.

Take a look at some of these song titles from Coheed & Cambria's various albums:
In Keeping Secrets of Silent Earth: 3
Cuts Marked in the March of Men
The Camper Velourium III: Al the Killer
Ten Speed (Of God's Blood & Burial)
The Lying Lies & Dirty Secrets of Miss Erica Court
Justice in Murder

Sheesh. Am I right?

Anyway, since I fancy myself quick on the ol' keyboard, I figured I could do just as well at naming songs. Now I'm thinking C&C should hire me to be their full-time title guy.

What do you think? Here are my titles:
The infinite sadness divided by the coursing winds of love and pain

Darkness encompasses the fragile body of lies and deception

Wreaking endless torment: The foul earth divides into shades of black

I cower (at the dawn of death and impassable light)

The awakening of glory and the madness of peril

Escaping lust volume 3

Shadow conquers the holy magistrate

I could go on and on. So whattaya say, C&C? Do I have a job?

Coheed and Cambria

I have a message for Coheed & Cambria: Relax. It’s just music.

A good friend of mine sent me some C&C songs yesterday and I promptly loaded them into the library, promising him I’d give Coheed & Cambria the old college try. I’ve been listening to the songs since, and I’ve developed some mixed feelings.

First off, I like the music. I enjoy listening to it. It’s emotional, it’s raw and you can easily get lost in it.

I’m a big fan of Welcome Home and Everything Evil, and others such as Delirium Trigger and Three Evils (Embodied in Love and Shadow) are close behind.

But after you listen for a while you start to notice something about C&C: This music is not your typical superficial stuff. It’s heavy—meaty. If this music were food it would be The Bacon Explosion. It sits with you for days and days.

And for that reason, C&C makes me a little nervous. I mean, go back and take a look at some of those song titles. These are deep, dark songs and when you listen to them you almost have to do so in a cave to get the full effect. It’s not exactly background music. It takes center stage, and you have to invest yourself in it.

Fitting, I suppose, since Coheed & Cambria’s music tells one long, epic story. All the songs and albums are intertwined. They even have comic books dedicated to the band’s music.

Yes, comic books. Another red flag.

I don’t know… Like I said, I like the music. I enjoy banging my head and losing myself in the story, but deep down I get the impression that by listening to this music I am getting one step closer to buying Japanese Anime, locking myself in my room and cutting my arms when I get bored.

So to sum up, C&C is good, but if you're just a casual listener you might want to steer your boat in another direction. I can see why they have such a devoted following, but in the end they just need to take a deep breath and lighten up.